Trump on Syrian Missile Strike: “This Is for Gamergate”

Yesterday the United States launched 59 tomahawk missiles on a Syrian government airfield, making headlines around the world. It was in retaliation to a chemical attack that killed civilians in rebel controlled territory, allegedly carried out by the Syrian government, although this was not confirmed before the missile attack was launched. It’s a move that has garnered harsh criticism, with many saying that Trump’s actions seem poorly thought out, but the US president has clarified his motives in an exclusive interview with The Insatiable Gamer: “I was aiming for Kotaku.”

Kotaku has been referred to as “the¬†thinking man’s video game journalism”


Acting upon false intel, the strike was actually meant to take down a cache of Kotaku’s servers, which have long been rumored to be located in Syria due to significantly cheaper running costs. All of this was in retaliation to the Gamergate scandal that spread through the gaming community in 2013, calling for more integrity in video game journalism.

Trump recalls:¬†“Gamergate was a prime example of professional victims cashing in on the liberal narrative. It was an absolutely shameful display, and the fact that [Kotaku] received little to no formal¬†condemnation for their substantial role in it at the time just goes to show the lack of a backbone in our former president.”

“We need to show them that we’re not afraid, to stand up for what is right, for ethics in video game journalism, and to show that we will not tolerate their Buzzfeed-tier garbage infecting young, impressionable minds”.

“I don’t want people to get the wrong idea, that I’m just some puppet, or that I’m a bumbling idiot with no fucking clue what I’ve got myself into” he continues. “Anyone can tell you that simply isn’t true.”

Upon receiving news that the server cache was actually an unmanned Syrian air base, Trump says it was “regrettable, but only because those talentless hacks will continue to operate their website”.

Trump ends the interview on a lighter note; “My good friends at The Insatiable Gamer, or TIG as I call them, and I’m allowed to call them that because we’re very close. They are an example of fantastic video game journalism, simply the best, and they are my main source of video game news and reviews. No one does gaming journalism like these guys.”

Also published on Medium.

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